Monday, November 28, 2011

pathetic pantyhose problems

I used to like Kate Middleton.  Then I heard that she's single-handedly responsible for bringing pantyhose back into style.  Now I'm not so sure about her.  I know, I know.  I've seen Princess Diaries.  Pantyhose are a princess thing.  I should be forgiving.

By the way, writing tip of the day--You don't spell them "panty-hoes."  (It must have been a Freudian slip in my first draft.  Sorry to anyone reading my ARC.)


Seeing as how pantyhose are back in style, I thought I'd be princess-like and wear a pair to church.  Now here's my problem with pantyhose--they're always falling down.  I guess that's because I'm tall.  Shorter women I talk to have confessed that the waist band comes up way too high on them.

Anywho, after putting on my pantyhose, I felt that something wasn't quite right, but I was in a hurry.  Before I sat down at my pew, I surreptitiously hiked up my pantyhose because they were already slipping down on me.  After the first meeting, I agreed to substitute in a primary class of four year olds.  By this time, the waistband was around mid-thigh.  It didn't stay there either.  Every time I moved, the waist band slipped lower until it was just above my knees.

About half-way through the lesson, the children figured out that there was a draft coming in through the window.  Normally, I would have said, "Don't worry about the window.  We're talking about really important stuff here."  But this time, I took advantage of their distraction to remove my pantyhose.  Before anyone turned around, my pantyhose were safely stowed in my purse.  All it took was a couple of yanks.  I figure if Anne Hathaway can put on pantyhose in the backseat of a limousine, I can take them off in primary.

10 comments:

  1. Panty-hoes! Hahaha! I've never had pantyhose come down my legs, but I know several women who have. Too funny!

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  2. Ha ha - thanks for the good laugh today. I, being a shorter woman, have never had that problem. But you are also slender. If I were you, I'd say it's a problem of being so slender for your height!

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  3. My ghetto booty takes up the extra space, so I don't have the problem of the waistband coming too high. If your skirt is long enough, knee-hi's can be a beautiful thing! If not, I go with high quality control top pantyhose, or nice warm tights. I find the quality is totally worth the extra cost. I'm usually in tights since I ride the bus and hate being cold.

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  4. P.S. Got a really good laugh out of this one!

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  5. Oh my gosh. Too funny. You're lucky you didn't get caught. A child telling their mother that the teacher took off her pantyhoes in class might have got some strange looks.

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  6. You won a prize in the LDS Publisher comment contest. Send me your mailing address.

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  7. I should add that according to my editor, Michelle, the correct spelling is panty hose, yet another reason why I don't like them.

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  8. I can Soooooo relate, tho mine haven't fallen down that far. I admit to having to go into the restroom at least twice each Sunday to pull mine up! But I enjoyed the hearty laugh from your description. Thanks so much for the great story.

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  9. I think the problem lies with your choice of pantyhose. If your pantyhose always seem to bag at the ankles, then you are wearing the wrong pantyhose. Avoid 100% nylon pantyhose (they do NOT stay put). Choose pantyhose with spandex in them. L'eggs Sheer Energy are a truly outstanding product. You can quite easily spend 4 times as much and get a product that is inferior to L’eggs Sheer Energy. The spandex in L'eggs Sheer Energy helps them stay put. They also add comfort, silkiness, and a massage feeling. L’eggs Sheer Energy have 20 % Spandex in the legs and 12 % Spandex in the Panty. If you wear L'eggs Sheer Energy in the correct size, they will not bag at the ankles. Many years ago, Consumer Reports wrote up pantyhose. On two different surveys, conducted years apart, L’eggs Sheer Energy came out as the double-blind favorite of the women who participated in both studies. L’eggs Sheer Energy beat out Givenchy Round the Clock and many other expensive department store brands for comfort, fit, and longevity .

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